Mended Hearts Open Forum

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  • 1.  New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-15-2022 08:11
    Hello,

    My name is Larry, I am 78 years old and I had a heart attack on June 16th.
    And another on June 17th.
    While I was in the hospital someone from Mended Hearts came through and
    talked to those that wanted to. He was a very nice person.
    I am beginning to have a few problems now so I thought I would come here
    and see how other folks are working things out.
    To make a long story not quite so long, I had a mild heart attack on June 16th.
    Was taken to a hospital and they ran some tests and immediately shipped me
    to the local hospital that specializes in cardiac care.
    I remember none of the following, but I was told that on the 17th I had a
    "massive heart attack" (their words) while on the angio table.
    They zipped me off to surgery, telling my wife "it's serious and he may not make it".
    Woke up 4 days later in ICU with a CABG x 5.
    I was sent home on July 22nd and am now in cardiac rehab.
    I can walk using a walker now for around 600 feet or so but
    I get short of breath due to the damage to my heart. Even standing is hard.
    No pain...........nothing.

    I believe I am starting to get depressed.
    First, this has completely uprooted our home life.
    Everything we do involves my treatments etc.
    My wife has been my rock. She spent 8 to 10 hours at my bedside every day.
    Now she is doing everything at home I cannot do.
    She doesn't deserves that and it makes me feel like Hell.
    I am extremely tired all the time, have no interest in food or my favorite hobby
    which was guitar. Played for 50+ years. Haven't wanted to touch one since I got home.
    I no longer want to read either.
    So, I was curious if others have had similar reactions to their surgery.
    Just sort of a general malaise, being tired and no motivation.
    I will give myself some credit as I am not just sitting around all day.
    I try to help in the kitchen, dusting etc. and go for several walks outside each day.
    Plus cardiac therapy twice a week.
    It's the mental cloud of doom that is driving me nuts.

    Sorry for the long first post but I have no one here to give me advice.
    Can't talk to a doctor. All that make them do is want to order more tests.
    Had my fill of that.

    Hope everyone in here is doing well and has a nice day.

    Larry

    ------------------------------
    Larry Carlson
    ------------------------------


  • 2.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-15-2022 11:55
    Hey Larry, Sounds like you're doing everything right.  Doom and gloom, according to my doc who's had a valve replacement himself, are quite the regular occurrence among heart replacements.  I had stents put it (6) in 2019, got over the gloomy feelings after a few months, but had a MI in the last year (don't know when), and am now really going thru those feelings.  So I know it just comes over a person.  I have a counselor I've been seeing anyway, and he's had aFib issues, so he knows what it's like too. I actually have some homeopathic drops I take which help keep my spirits up.
    I think giving yourself credit for doing what you're supposed to be doing at this point is important.  It's been less than a month for you, so try not to demand that much of yourself.  Your wife sounds very understanding and like she will have it in the long run, which is what counts.  I've been putting my husband thru it since the first of the year when I was diagnosed with the MI and now i think he's some sort of prince for hanging there with me. 
    There are videos on the American heart Assoc. site where various people talk about having these feelings.  Helped me feel I was not so alone. 
    Keep with it!
    Sue

    ------------------------------
    Sue Tegland
    Everett WA
    ------------------------------



  • 3.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-15-2022 11:56
    i didn't mean replacements--I meant procedures.
    Sue

    ------------------------------
    Sue Tegland
    Everett WA
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  • 4.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-16-2022 14:35

    Hi Larry and Sue,

    I had a heart attack and quintuple bypass surgery 4 1/2 years ago and I'm here to tell you it does get better.  Larry, I actually woke up 2 weeks after my surgery because they had me in a medically induced coma to deal with the ventilator pneumonia I contracted after surgery.  When I was liberated from the hospital, I then spent 3 weeks in an inpatient rehab facility learning to walk and feed myself again.  I didn't suffer any depression because I was just happy to still be alive, which survival was in some doubt when I was kept sedated in the coma.

    I'm married also and my wife was right by my side every step of the way including when I finally got home, at least until I started complaining about being babied.  My recovery was quite rapid and I was back in a gym (a real one, not the rehab gym) 3 months after surgery, lifting weights and eventually running again.  I also went back to work in 3 months but that was less successful.  I found that my life experience with the heart attack and surgery, and my near death experience, had made it difficult for me to feel the same level of commitment to every day work problems as I had felt before the surgery. I somehow felt more connected to the while of existence.  I eventually retired and am happy for having done it.

    You both ought to read the book published by my friend and fellow Mended Hearts brother Bob Levin, along with his wife Adele.  It is called "I Will Keep You Alive" and it used to be in Amazon.  It tells the often harrowing tale of Bob's heart attacks, stenting and subsequent bypass surgery, and Adele's courageous journey right by his side through the whole ordeal.  I highly recommend it to everyone reading this post.  If Bob sees this post, he'll no doubt tell you how you can order it if it's no longer on Amazon.  


    All the best to both of you and to your respective spouses.

    Ira



    ------------------------------
    Ira Reid
    Hoboken NJ
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  • 5.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-17-2022 18:59
    TThanks for the plug, Ira. Signed copies of "I Will Keep You Alive" are available from Spruce Hill Press, POB 9492, Berkeley, CA 94709. You can use Pay Pal or, if you send a check for $16.50 and say you belong to Mended Hearts, you will get it for 10% off cover price, plus postage.

    Bob Levin





  • 6.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-16-2022 09:53
    Larry-  My history is a little different than yours -- mild MI when I was 69; major one two months later; OHS 6-mos after that. Depression is a common part of the process. Tell your doctor and with the right meds you should be okay. (It may take a couple to get the one that fits you.) Do what you can physically every day. Keep your rehab appointments. Walk on your off days. (30 minutes a day; six days a week -- for the rest of your life, they told us. If it rains, do aisles in the supermarket or at the shopping mall. Join a gym if that's feasible. STAY POSITIVE. There are no guarantees but many many people get much better. It's been 11-years post-op for me; there've been a couple bumps along the way, but I feel great and am quite active.

    ------------------------------
    Bob] Levin
    Berkeley CA
    adelbob@comcast.netRobertRobert
    ------------------------------



  • 7.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-21-2022 21:52
    Dear Larry
    1. Please talk to your heart/ surgeon Dr about depression. Its has at least two causes. Situational you described perfectly, as you feel badly about not being able to help out at home. Secondly, it seems to be just part if the heart surgery recovery process by nature.
    2. At Mended Hearts we are here for the heart patients AND their caregivers. I am a hospital visitor, and often we talk with care givers. My advice to your wife: Please ask for and accept help from others. Relatives, friends, church volunteers etc. Help includes grocery shopping, bringing food, and other errands. She might not want to leave you alone at home when she goes out. Ask a friend can stay with you while she goes to the beauty shop or out to lunch with friends. Actually asking for help is actually a gift you give your friends. When you are well, you can help others

    It helps your wife if you offer her gratitude and try to not be cranky( my character flaw).

    Marilyn B. Rosenhouse
    Mobile: (214)850-0655




  • 8.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-22-2022 12:16

    Hello Larry, I'm in the same situation.   

     Being Mrs sole primary care-provider with achieving daily multiple activities for over ten years as she has Primary Progressive MS, PPMS, with severe damage to the frontal lobe causing cognitive issues has/is not easy and a daily challenge and takes effort and currently is being diminished daily as I have to now take care of my health  " Your mask on first ..." which is contrary to how I was.  Yes, currently I'm unable to achieve as I did prior and it's not easy to dislocate from my care provider activities.  

     

    With no network and knowing our current circumstances independently we are slowly getting on with the 'on-the-job training' OJT working through what we are able to achieve and letting go of others.

     Mrs with her MS brain has her own cognitive issues/depression to deal with.  

                Currently we are not each others greatest supporters. This will pass!

     

    Background I'm 72:  I'd had a mitral valve prolapse with no symptoms for over 40 years. In 2020 I had both hips replaced due arthritis and believe this led to the DVT and saddle pulmonary embolism PE, which medicals won't admit too, which let to open heart 3/23/2022.  Both valves replaced, aorta repaired, by-pass, stabilized through shocking, pacemaker; ten days inpatient. Outpatient, 14 days with a Foley catheter and the left lung drained which was very unpleasant. Completed cardio rehab with good results. So physically doing well.

      

    Recently, after three months post surgery through my self awareness and recognizing cognitive disfunction after the open heart surgery and my in-depth research I recognize I'm not myself cognitively. Similar as expressed by others, my thoughts being very negative, why did I have surgery, what was the point, why am I here, no future?  I have lost interest in things, forgetting words and spelling, slight short term memory loss, don't want to be around people, have little tolerance, get impatient quickly ....

          The post surgery mental-ness is known by cardiologists who at pre-consultation fail to mention.

     

    My Brain is recuperating [thawing = the process of becoming friendlier or more cordial]

    // Being aware and attempting to regain positivity+// Warm  Regards Derek

     

     

     

     






  • 9.  RE: New Here and Seeing How Others Are Handling Things

    Posted 08-22-2022 12:16

    Hello Larry, I'm in the same situation.   

     Being Mrs sole primary care-provider with achieving daily multiple activities for over ten years as she has Primary Progressive MS, PPMS, with severe damage to the frontal lobe causing cognitive issues has/is not easy and a daily challenge and takes effort and currently is being diminished daily as I have to now take care of my health  " Your mask on first …" which is contrary to how I was.  Yes, currently I'm unable to achieve as I did prior and it's not easy to dislocate from my care provider activities.   

    With no network and knowing our current circumstances independently we are slowly getting on with the 'on-the-job training' OJT working through what we are able to achieve and letting go of others.

     Mrs with her MS brain has her own cognitive issues/depression to deal with.  

                Currently we are not each others greatest supporters. This will pass! 

    Background I'm 72:  I'd had a mitral valve prolapse with no symptoms for over 40 years. In 2020 I had both hips replaced due arthritis and believe this led to the DVT and saddle pulmonary embolism PE, which medicals won't admit too, which let to open heart 3/23/2022.  Both valves replaced, aorta repaired, by-pass, stabilized through shocking, pacemaker; ten days inpatient. Outpatient, 14 days with a Foley catheter and the left lung drained which was very unpleasant. Completed cardio rehab with good results. So physically doing well.  

    Recently, after three months post surgery through my self awareness and recognizing cognitive disfunction after the open heart surgery and my in-depth research I recognize I'm not myself cognitively. Similar as expressed by others, my thoughts being very negative, why did I have surgery, what was the point, why am I here, no future?  I have lost interest in things, forgetting words and spelling, slight short term memory loss, don't want to be around people, have little tolerance, get impatient quickly ….

          The post-surgery mental-ness is known by cardiologists who at pre-consultation fail to mention. 

     My Brain is recuperating [thawing = the process of becoming friendlier or more cordial]

    // Being aware and attempting to regain positivity+// Warm  Regards Derek

     



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    TN Derek
    ------------------------------